Commit2Change

Kindness and Silence

Kindness and Silence

by Michael Feeley January 25, 2026

 

You’re being attacked. Someone at work, in your community, relentlessly pushing every button you have. Your body wants to fight back. Your mind rehearses the perfect comeback. And kindness says: don’t.

Not because you’re weak. Because you’re strategic.

Real kindness is the hard assessment that this person—unstable, unwell in ways you can’t diagnose—will only escalate if you engage. Your response becomes their fuel. Your silence? That’s the kindness you’re giving yourself.

Watch. Assess. Say little.

This isn’t passive. You’re gathering information while they reveal themselves. You’re protecting your energy while they spend theirs.

Ask yourself: What kind of attention do I actually want here? What outcome am I hoping for? Because if what you want is resolution, vindication, or peace, fighting back rarely delivers.

Instead, document. Quietly reach out to trusted friends, your boss, HR, community leaders, maybe a lawyer. Map your options. Build your case if you need one. Let the struggle clarify what matters and what doesn’t.

The strongest thing you can do when someone attacks is refuse to become them. Stay centered. Stay logical. Grounded with all the emotions racing inside. Let their instability expose itself while your stability speaks for itself.

Kindness doesn’t always look gentle. Sometimes it’s fierce and gentle wisdom knowing when to fight, how to fight—and when staying whole matters more than being right.

Perhaps the hardest questions are:

How long does strategic silence last before it becomes enabling?

When does kindness to yourself require you to fight back?

 

Thanks – Michael (he, him)

Please share this Daily.
This matters too – Kindness to Self and Others.

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Michael has twenty years experience matching people with positions that allows them to reach their potential. Having worked with corporate decision makers, Michael has expertise in understanding organizational needs in multiple industries. He understands, experientially and intuitively, what gets people hired and what doesn’t. With a big heart and intellect to match, Michael Feeley is an authority on bringing the best out of business owners, executives, and entrepreneurs… he has such amazing energy, not to mention a terrific business background.

Libby Gill

Business Coach, Brand Strategist & Best Selling Author

…as a trainer I watched Michael Feeley become a masterful coach, being adept at many coaching skills… he is supportive, motivational, action-oriented, open minded, authentic, confident and compassionate… such a delight to work with… fun, high-energy, intuitive, spontaneous!… I have observed him to be very inspirational, empowering, and encouraging clients to go to greater depths in their lives. He is a true ambassador of the profession… Michael has heart and soul along with the ability to deliver!

Deborah Van de Grift – CPC, ELI-MP, PCC

Vice President iPEC – Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching

You, my friend, are the Real Deal.

Matthew Carey

Host of Studio Time Podcast

Australia

Michael Feeley walks the walk and talks the talk. He is honest, authentic and incredibly generous in spirit. Michael’s deep commitment to service means his clients get his full attention and will benefit from his coaching skills, experience and wisdom.

Kathy Karn

Psychotherapist, Photographer and Storyteller / www.kathykarn.com

London ON Canada

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